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unloved

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(destroy me)

[09 Oct 2010|02:35am]
[ mood | optimistic ]

fuck!
fuuuuckkkk.
fuuuuuuuuck.
fuckkkk.
fuuuuuuuuuuuuuucccckkkk.
fuck!

...and shit!

(destroy me)

[03 Oct 2008|11:59am]
[ mood | excited ]

Things are finally starting to go well.
New Job starts today at 2.
Computer is fixed.
Radio in car is working again.
Sick dog is well again.
New friends are amazing.
The end.

Photobucket

(destroy me)

[17 Aug 2008|09:15pm]
A - Age: 23
B - Band: Blood for Blood
C - Choice Of Meat: bacon
D - Dream Day: often
E - Excites You: YOU!
F - Favorite Food: burritos!
G - Greatest Gift: herpes are forever. not diamonds.
H - Happiest Day Of Your Life: None yet
I - Internal conflicts: what to do about fairweather friends
J - Jealous: nay
K - Kool Aid: ick
L - Love: is for suckers
M - Most Valuable Thing You Own: beer
N - Name: asshole
O - Outfit: jeans and hoodie
P - Pizza Topping: soy cheese
Q - Question I want to ask: fuck you?
R - Roots: none
S - Sport to watch: table tennis
T - TV show: the deadliest catch.
U - Unique habits: insanity
V - View from the window: the lights of portland
W - Weather I Love: not humidity
Y - Yesterday's best meal: dog semen

Sign: Virgo
First name: Sara
Middle name: M
Age: 23
Birthdate: 9/14/84
Eye color: blueish-gay
Hair color: redish
Hair--straight or curly?: afro
High school: skidrow high school
What college do you want to go to, or go to already?: Went to Harvard, Yale, Dartmouth. DUH!
Major: proctology
What do you want to do for a living?: anal plundering

Favorite classes: rectum 101

Hobbies: beer

Do you have a picture online?: perhaps

Do you have an online journal?: obviously not

Do you live in a house or apartment?: munjoy hill mansion

Location: east end

Classes you are taking now? rectum 201

Do you drive?: Yep

Do you have siblings?: no.

Part Two: Future.

Where do you see yourself in ten years?: drunk and/or homeless on some park bench
20 years?: being a millionaire
When do you want to be married?: maybe after i die. someone can take my sexy corpse to be their bride.
How many kids do you want to have?: -2
What will you name them?: Rusty Coat Hanger for a boy or Morning After Pill for a girl.
Where do you want to live when you get older?: under a rock.

Favorites

Horror movie: It
Sitcom tv show: weeds
Drama tv show: deadliest catch
Reality tv show: deadliest catch
Talk show: deadliest catch

Holiday: halloween or st pats
Days of the week: thursday

Actor: ethan embry
Actresses: Divine
Books: anything about southie

Magazines:
Indoor activity: none
Outdoor activity: none
Singer/artist/bands: boston bands
Thing in your room: red hooker shoes
Gum: none
Candy: none
Drink (w/alcohol): beer
Drink (w/o alcohol): anything you can add whiskey to.
Animal: wolverine
Toothpaste: mint

Shampoo/conditioner: herbal

Muppet character: ew. creepy. none.
Color: red

Starbucks drink: chai
Restaurant: friendly toast
Bar: amigos
Place: the ocean
Song: faithless - too many
Website: none. the internet is lame
Thing to do online: stalk people.
Car: vw

Which do you prefer

Prada or Gucci?: sailor jerry

Black ink or Blue ink?: Black
Gum or Mint?: Gum
Soda or Water?: PBR
Digital camera or Regular camera?: both

Coffee or Tea?: coffee please

Phone or IM?: text
Museum or Shopping?: Museum
Hot or Cold? Cold
Rain or Snow?: snow


Part Six: Have You?

Gone skinny dipping?: Yes
Been hospitalized? no
Been on a cruise?: yeah in Alaska
Met anyone famous?: sure

Broken a law?: probably


What does your room look like: its appears a shit bomb went off in here
If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?: far far away
Do you have a tv in your room?: yes

Do you have your own phone line?: cell

What kind of cellphone do you have?: old sidekick
What kind of computer do you use?: a gray one
Do you play any instruments?: nope

(destroy me)

[27 Jun 2008|02:03pm]
Fuck.
I'm stuck in hell.

(destroy me)

[26 May 2008|12:37am]
[ mood | restless ]

If you haven't been there then you'll never understand
I've stolen, I've lied, I've traded my pride,
'cause I never had a helping hand
They'll steal your innocence and they'll take away your soul
I've stolen, I've lied and there were times when there wasn't anyplace to go
So let's go!
I been runnin', I been runnin' with the hunted,
I been runnin' for my whole life
I'm in exile
And I got nothin' but a hope inside,
in my heart where hope has died
I been livin' in exile
Tears and pain like a stinging rain,
have passed before my eyes
I'm in exile

How many tears have they torn from my eyes?
How many times will we be denied?
They lock us up and they hold us down,
just another wasted youth, another dead end town
I been waiting so long
I been waiting now my hope is... gone

(1 attempt | destroy me)

[09 May 2008|09:35pm]
[ mood | amused ]

Best album ever.
What's better than 101 90's punk bands singing 30 second songs?
NOTHIN!
Photobucket
So glad I found my copy after it being missing for like 7 years. W00t!

(destroy me)

[09 May 2008|12:03am]
[ mood | morose ]

The hardest thing to do is admitting to yourself that you have failed.
Failed at making yourself happy.
Failed at doing anything great.
Failed. Period.

It takes a while for it all to catch up with you before you realize you lost everything.
Lost who you were.
Lost who you wanted to be.
Lost the feeling of self.

4 years ago I was the happiest, luckiest person I knew. Shit just feel into place. However somewhere along the way I lost it all. I look in the mirror and don't recognize the person looking back at me anymore. How did I fuck it all up so badly? Was it all my fault or did someone break me along the way?

I need to feel like me again.

(destroy me)

[13 Apr 2008|05:38pm]
[ mood | confused ]

I feel like I want to puke up my spleen.
I feel like I want to fucking cry to eyes out.
I feel like I need to punch someone in the fucking face.
I feel like I'm going to explode.

Life officially hates me.
And the feeling is mutual.

As far as old friends go...
If you fucked me over years ago...
You can go fuck yourself now.

Today has been emotionally overwhelming.
I need a beer.

(1 attempt | destroy me)

[11 Apr 2008|04:54pm]
[ mood | amused ]

I've been known to make less than favorable decisions while drunk.
But that's all a part of my charm and class.
Awwww yeah Boi!
hah.

The weekend is apon us.
Fuck the rain.
Let's get buck wild!

(2 attempts | destroy me)

[10 Apr 2008|04:32am]
[ mood | chipper ]

colucci's.
amigos.
old friends.
east end.
pbr til 4am.
life is good.

(4 attempts | destroy me)

[13 Jan 2008|01:35pm]
fuckin W00t!
This is what I found my car looking like this morning when I went to get a coffee.
Please note...
they broke my fuckin window to steal a 20g 3rd gen ipod which probs is only worth like 30 bux.
I hate people more than ever.

Photobucket

(destroy me)

[07 Jan 2008|10:54pm]
I just bought myself these as a late xmas gift...
Photobucket


I was going to get these since I'm lame and have the right design tattooed on my right foot.... but they're sold out right now. BOOOO. My lameness will have to wait for another day I suppose.

Photobucket

(destroy me)

[02 Jan 2008|04:43pm]
I drink way too much.
Then make an ass out of myself.
And make new friends.
And laugh a lot.
And drink even more.
And get in fights.
And make fun of assholes.
And smoke to much.
And I like it that way.
My life is good.

(destroy me)

[29 Dec 2007|02:37am]
Don't ever put your faith in me I'll only let ya down
Don't pick me up when I'm stumbling just leave me on the ground
And right or wrong I'll stick by the things I say
And I couldn't give a shit if ya go or if ya stay


I don't need your pity and I don't need your bullshit lies
And I don't' want your opinion on the faults of my life
You can talk all you want but I won't hear a word you say
I'm an unforgiving prick and I'm just living the bastard's way

When my day has come and I lie beneath the dirt
People gather smiles wide and poor booze upon the earth
They'll remember all the good times but only talk about the bad
They'll drink or say whatever it takes to keep from getting sad

I'm an unforgiving prick and I'm just living the bastard's way

(destroy me)

[25 Dec 2007|03:33am]
I've fallen to pieces.
Time to sweep them from the floor and reassemble myself.

(destroy me)

[23 Dec 2007|01:59am]
do you remember the story of the girl and her first date? he took her to the lake and she fell in love. she spent one summer waking up between his arms. she told him how good that felt, told him he was the one. and then he went away, his calls were not returned. she went to see him, but his eyes were burning a different stare. the focus was somewhere else. and that feeling had somehow disappeared. do you remember when they both drove out of state? stealing kisses behind her cousins back. with a love so strong tell me who could wait? when it seems so right and it feels so right. man, it had to be right. when it seems so right and it feels so right. man, it had to be right. gotta be right. when it seems so right and it feels so right. man, it had to be right. when it seems so right and it feels so right. man, it had to be right. but then he went away and he's not coming back. and i'm pretty sure that girl is staying in tonight.

(destroy me)

[20 Dec 2007|01:46am]
my only motivation
are others expectations
what kinda punk would i be
if i took shit for being me?

(destroy me)

[18 Dec 2007|01:36am]
[ mood | blank ]

Ladies and Gentlemen,
Step up and take a swing at the Human Pinata.
Go on, take your best shot.
You can't possibly do more damage.
Everything inside now lays scattered on the floor.
All that remains, a hallowed shell with years of damage.
Never would have guessed that this would be the final tiny swing,
that would split her wide open.
So take your best shot.
And add a few more dents to the frame.
Because there's nothing left inside anyway.

(destroy me)

[15 Dec 2007|10:51pm]
My mom is offically in town.

Which currently means.......


I fucking hate my life.

(destroy me)

[13 Dec 2007|11:37am]
[ mood | cold ]

I hate days off... Even if they're not full days off, like today. I get nothing productive done.

Things I should be doing:

Cleaning the apartment
Getting my oil changed
Purchasing food for the apartment
Returning Bottles
Washing the dog
X-Mas Shopping
Figuring out which IRA plan to go with
Putting away clean laundry
Making new duvet cover
Paying Bills



What I will end up doing today:

Writing this useless shit in my LJ
Getting Coffee
Driving to the beach
Watching Law & Order which I've probably already seen
Eating food
Taking a nap
Visiting Jana and/or Janna at work
Driving around some more
Eating more food
Going to work for 3 hours
Cursing myself for not accomplishing anything I actally needed to do today

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